19 March 2024, Tuesday, 10:23
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The Publican

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The Publican
Iryna Khalip

The Belarusian dictator has turned into a servant.

In Russia of the 19th century a publican was a man who sold vodka. For instance, a man is sitting in a pub and drinking vodka. He suspects that vodka is watered and calls the publican: "Tell me, rascal, is vodka watered?" He answers: "No way, I swear!" and kisses the cross. But it's still watered, but who is to have doubts when the cross is kissed. Hence the name of the profession.

Now the features of that century-before-last publican are increasingly observed in Lukashenka's behaviour. He kisses everything he sees: the Koran, the Order of Azerbaijan. He is like a child who learned how to crawl and grabs everything he sees and puts in the mouth. But he is not a child. He should have understood what should be put in mouth, what things should be kissed, and what causes laughter. But he does not understand.

It would be better if he kissed only things. But he is ready to kiss everything and everyone. Putin and Medvedev, and Erdogan, and Aliyev. He even tried to kiss Merkel when "Normandy 4" met in Minsk, but he failed. It was typical for Leonid Brezhnev in his idiocy: he kissed everyone with relish (how was it possible?) But "Dear Leonid Ilyich" suffered from idiocy. And here we have a man of average ages, he should have understood...

He does not suffer from idiocy, he is not a child, but does not understand and does not see that he behaves like a publican from a county useless tavern. Have you noticed that once confident dictator turned into a servant? He kowtows, grovels in the dust, takes bows, and begs for tips. Kisses an order and swears Aliyev that he will "work off". How is he going to do it? Will he kiss Aliyev's shoes then? Or will he reap cotton like a Soviet Young Pioneer Mamlakat Nahangova? Or will he sell vodka neat in Azerbaijan? Or, perhaps, to award Orders of Francysk Skaryna to Ilham Aliyev, his wife and children and to cast golden monuments in the center of Minsk next to the Lenin monument?

One thing is raising interest - it would be okay, if only Belarusians who confront Lukashenka could laugh watching his servile tricks. But there are people in Belarus who sincerely like him and even vote for him. There will be 3-4 of them. At least two of them - his older sons, for example, (later they will make excuses and tell in public that Vitya, for example, voted for Sannikov, and Dima - for Statkevich, but we know the truth.) Why don't they say honestly: "Daddy, you've been looking foolish lately. The entire country laughs at you. You'd better leave and not make people laugh." They should be the first who are interested in the image of their daddy as a rough dictator, but not a servant-publican from a worthless pub, who kowtows, crosses himself and swears on the Koran that vodka is not watered. But everyone is silent.

They watch over him: let him have fun, if he likes it. And there is no one, but sons to tell the truth. Because all the rest are servants of the publican, they wait on the rest of the world to start laughing. So loud, that the authorities will explode from a thunderous laughter. And they will order their former boss: "Hey, publican, bring vodka here, faster! Don't forget sausages!"

Iryna Khalip, especially for charter97.org

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